Wednesday, May 15, 2013
A DIFFERENT WAY TO WRITE AN OBITUARY
In our writing class at the Tolland Senior Center, we were talking about obituary writing, which does not seem inappropriate in this group. The point was made that when you read an obituary, you really don't know very much about the kind of person he/she was, In this assignment, we were to try to make it more personal, rather than a collection of data .
Here is what I wrote, and the listeners said they liked it.
May 4, 2013 ==An Alternate
Obituary For Old
Bob Noonan—
May 4, 2013 ==An Alternate
Obituary For Old
Bob Noonan—
Here is what I wrote, and the listeners said they liked it.
What kind of guy
was Bob? How did
he get that way?
As a lifetime teacher,
does he have any observations
to offer descendants?
What words would
he want on his tombstone?
Bob was blessed. He
was born intelligent,
and was able to interpret,
to evaluate his
experiences and create a
set of his own
values. He was
born into a dysfunctional family
in the depression
years and experienced what
that term implies:
poor nutrition, no
timely dental care, embarrassing
living accommodations and
a culture of
drinking, fighting and disrespect.
Bob took part, as a small child,
in many a brawl at
home and was affected by the atmosphere.
Amid all the
disarray, was the overriding
insistence that if you were
not Irish Catholic, you weren’t
much good. It
didn’t take long for a
smart kid such as Bob to
begin to question if this
were really true.
If this is good, what is
bad?
Bob began to distill a philosophy of
considering what was
really important. It
wasn’t what he was
witnessing at home. This question guided him through life. One standard
applied to the
matter of relative importance
became, “If it ain’t cancer…”
Among other things,
Bob promised himself
he would not be
an abusive drinker,
would never physically
abuse his future wife.
And he never did
in a marriage which has gone more than 61
years, so far.
Bob was grateful,
blessed, for the
things he had.
He gave away all
kinds of material
things in his
lengthy life. Bob
became a good outcome of a bad beginning.
Bob was lucky, too.
After surviving a childhood
so uncertain, he
survived a shooting
war in the
Pacific, along with
typhoons at sea. Seemed like the good lord was saving Bob
for something, or
more likely someone. Rosemary
was the reason.
She produced 8
healthy children and
devoted herself to their
intellectual development, as well
as their growing up
needs. Without her,
Bob would have been gone
long ago. She
was, and is, a gifted manager
who takes charge
of everything. He stated
once at a testimonial
birthday party that,”she
handled poverty well.”
She gave him time
to pursue his teaching
career…He was blessed in
that, too.
In summary, let us
restate a 3 line
poem Bob wrote:
“ I hit the
lotto,
Not for
money, but for life,
I won
my family,
my health and my
wife.”
Comments:
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This is excellent, Dad. You're a good example of how a bad start doesn't mean a bad middle or end of the story. We are proud of you!
Sidenote: As an intermittent "designer" of behavioral interventions, I have often thought we should have everyone write their own obituary at age 25 - then ask them to live up to their (presumably desired) description. I think it would be an effective strategy to make people better.
Sidenote: As an intermittent "designer" of behavioral interventions, I have often thought we should have everyone write their own obituary at age 25 - then ask them to live up to their (presumably desired) description. I think it would be an effective strategy to make people better.
Dad,
Well done.
You taught your kids to be thankful for the things they have, not miserable about the things they don't have. I thought that was a lesson worth passing on so I taught my kids that. I'm sure that my self-writeen obit will echo similar "blessings".
Very nice comments about your wife, also.
Interesting idea Rita.
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Well done.
You taught your kids to be thankful for the things they have, not miserable about the things they don't have. I thought that was a lesson worth passing on so I taught my kids that. I'm sure that my self-writeen obit will echo similar "blessings".
Very nice comments about your wife, also.
Interesting idea Rita.
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